Family Midway Day

Our day at the Midway...(Sorry my computer just ate my post, and I have no energy to re-write it. So here are some photos of our day ;)

In front of the working engine model. I'm pretty sure he could have watched that thing all day!

Fun things to touch and try out...

Looking out to the water

So many airplanes, so little time!

Elliott loved being able to climb inside some of the planes and helicopters. In fact, he didn't understand why we couldn't get in all of them!

Hovercraft demonstration. Wow - those things are crazy!

Audio tour - Notice his ticket in his pocket? He wanted that in there the rest of the day!

Desert Storm tactical room.

About to make a very serious call!

Room o'knobs

Fighter pilot

Weekly Retrospective 9/25-10/1/11

"Weekend" Away

One of the things I really wanted to do this summer before Brad started school was go away for the weekend. We have periodically had nights to ourselves since Elliott was born, but rarely more than one in a row and never as part of a 'getaway'. I had been trolling for ideas of inexpensive (key) locations when, along with our Oxnard package, one for Primm, Nevada also popped up. We have often stopped in Primm for breakfast after leaving Las Vegas and would joke that we should just stay here sometime. So for a $139 package, we got a two night stay, $50 dining credit at the steakhouse and two massages. Sign me up!

Once there, it was easy to see why they offered up this mid-week special. Its pretty dead during the week and a lot of their amenities are only open on the weekend (like the tram between the casinos). But it was great for us, the room was nice, the steakhouse was delicious, the beer at the "Irish" pub was yummy and the spa was surprisingly nice (something I really wasn't expecting). We stayed at Buffalo Bill's but most everything else we did was over at the Primm Valley Casino, who's biggest issue was the Magnolia air freshener being pumped through the HVAC system (to aid in the southern ambiance? It didn't.).

Um...

We arrived on Labor Day and didn't have any other plans but for the scheduled spa treatments (I got them both :D) and our dinner reservations. We ended up driving into Vegas on Tuesday and decided to go out to the Hoover Dam and see the new bridge. We weren't really prepared for walking in the sun (no hats, not much sunscreen, hardly any water), so we took it easy, but still feel like we saw cool stuff. The bridge was really spectacular, but my camera/photos don't do it justice.

The Bridge

Water Line

The abyss: something Brad has wanted to see since he was a kid - can't you tell :)

For you, Meagan!

All in all the trip was nice. But it is easier for me to say that now. The only problem came from my inability to deal with stress, which ended up manifesting itself in an almost overpowering sense of dread during the vast majority of the trip. Brad received an unsettling email from school right before we left (which was only an issue because he was wait-listed for two of his key classes, and the email made it sound like he needed to be registered or he would lose his financial aid and housing - ugh). I knew it would be fine, it sounded like he was going to be added to at least one class by Tuesday night and there was nothing we could do about anything because of the holiday and turn-around time with the adviser's office. Yet I couldn't shake the dread. I was finally able to let go (and I'm glad I did!) on Tuesday night half way through dinner when it became obvious Brad wasn't going to be able to log into his email at the hotel. And of course, everything was resolved by the time he could log in on Wednesday, so all that stress, worry and physical pain was for nothing. So stupid. Worst part is that I 'knew' it would be fine, but I've lost my edge at being able to handle things like this and put them in their place. I attribute it to my new role as a mom since it's been like this the last couple of years. I think I'm just at capacity right now, so anything additional, is just too much.  Anyway, I'm sharing this mostly because I want to remember so that it doesn't happen again. Life is too short and letting things get to me like that will only make it shorter.

School Days

As briefly mentioned earlier, Elliott started school last month. Long before we knew we were moving, we had planned to start him the week of September 12th, so as to give him a bit of time to settle in before Brad started school on the 22nd. Fortunately for us, the move ended up falling into place perfectly with both Elliott's and Brad's school schedules.

Once we settled on Elliott's school, I felt really good about him going. I felt the timing was right and that he was ready. I was also more excited than nervous about him starting school...until a few days before school started. I guess my apprehension really started when we went away on our little getaway trip to Nevada. It aided in my overall feeling of uncertainty that followed me around those few days and culminated in a few shed tears on Sunday the 11th.

It's really starting to hit me that my little baby is growing up. I look at him and I see a little boy. This part of watching Elliott grow had previously been fairly easy to deal with because I always knew we would have another baby. Now we aren't so sure. So I've been feeling little specks of loss within these wonderfully exciting milestones a lot more now.

But all in all, the transition has been a good one and fairly uneventful. Elliott did really great his first day of school and it was all I could do to get him to leave with me when I went to pick him up. I have been cautiously optimistic each day because I know there will be days that it will be harder for him to say goodbye. In fact, we had our first tears last week. Fortunately, I drop him off fairly early, so there's lots of one-on-one time with his teacher if he is feeling a little unsure of being 'left behind'.

The teachers always give me an update about how his day went and there's little charts and things around the classroom to log nap time successes and meals, etc. It's fun to think of Elliott having his own 'day' that is different from Brad's or mine. He is getting exposed to and eating a wide variety of different foods, learning new songs, making some great art and learning to be friends. I am even starting to overhear him singing songs I can actually recognize (vs. his usual generic singing). In fact, I quiet often hear his very interesting interpretation of the alphabet song last ;)

Story Time

And he seems to love his teachers and they seem to love him, too. He likes one teacher in particular :)  They always tell me little stories about what he said or did that day. I guess the first day he was looking for a toy shovel. The teachers were helping him find it and when he did, he exclaimed 'oh, thank heavens!' Ha!

Weekly Retrospective 9/18-9/24/11

Mr. Cool

 

He makes looking cool look so easy!

Weekly Retrospective 9/11-9/17/11

Weekly Retrospective 9/4-9/10/11

Weekly Retrospective 8/28-9/3/11

Weekly Retrospective 8/21-8/27/11

Weekly Retrospective 8/14-8/20/11

Phew!

That was a busy couple of weeks! But we are officially settled and down to only one residence. Not to say that the odd box is not still here or there, but the bulk of things have been put away and we are more or less fully functional in the "new house".  And after a couple more working evenings, all remaining things should have a home. Problem is, its been busy (moving, overtime, swim lessons, a mini trip, vacation, county-wide black-out, Elliott starting school, etc., etc.), so we haven't had too many working evenings in the last week or so. I hope to address some of the 'fun things' in a few different posts, but again that depends on my evenings (last night putting together cardboard storage boxes from IKEA were about all I could handle) ;)

We are also gradually getting used to our new surroundings. Despite the fact that we lived in this area before, its been nearly 15 years and a lot of things have changed. Also our priorities have changed, so what we are looking for now, is different than before. But, I love our little wooded oasis amongst the skyscrapers and condos.

I have a ton of photos to share and plan to start doling them out so you can see all that we have been up to. But in the meantime, I wanted to let everyone know we are alive and survived the move and I am extraordinarily thankful for how well everything has gone. See you soon!

Moving update

We have been busy, busy, busy! Fortunately we have had an extra set of hands. Brad's mom flew in to help out on Tuesday and honestly, she's done the lion share of packing up so far.

Elliott's already figured out what's going on and when we drive up to our new place he says 'new house!' :) He's even packed a couple of his own boxes! He keeps saying that he's "workin" and "boxes to the new house!" Indeed, indeed!

We will officially be at the new place as of tomorrow, so wish us luck with the big furniture move! We decided it was high time to hire people to move our big stuff and I think we got a good company to help us.  And that means we don't have to hit up any of you for help! ;)

And while we are gaining a bedroom, we are losing a significant amount of our living room/dining room space. We are going to need to be creative, but it should all work out. I'm just looking forward to being settled again. It's been hard to be in limbo for the last week+.

Preschool

One of the things that we knew this fall would bring is preschool. Prior to Brad being accepted at UCSD, we weren't sure what form preschool would take, but we knew it was time. We are very thankful that Brad's schooling has taken the form it has, when it has. Brad's schedule has been more flexible while at Mesa, so between him and my mom, we have been able to keep Elliott at home so far.  This has been great for so many reasons, but it had also become more and more obvious in the last few months that it was time for Elliott to be around other kids on a regular basis as well as form bonds with adults other than his immediate family.

We also knew that UCSD meant an entirely different school commitment from Brad. So once we knew he was going, we started looking at preschools. We knew we had to choose a place that offered full-time days, but we were also hoping that we could find a place that was flexible in their schedule, so that Elliott could still be at home a couple days a week with my mom - both for her :) and for our wallet!

Let's just say, thinking about preschools was not something I enjoyed. There are so many different kinds out there. So many different philosophies. So many different methods. So many different formats. It was all very overwhelming. This is also an avenue where I don't really trust the internet. The last thing I wanted to do was take Elliott someplace I had found because I googled "san diego preschools'. I just don't trust what might pop up.  We wanted referrals. Problem is, we don't really know anyone who can give us any for our area and situation.

So we started with some of the bigger corporate schools for the obvious reasons (well regulated, good security, flexibility, etc.) and went from there. Then we also got a great list from UCSD that included referrals to lots of the smaller preschools as well. There really is something for everyone out there. It was nice to see a few different kinds of schools because we quickly learned what we really wanted in a school...and what we didn't. 

I had a picture of what I thought preschool for Elliott should be like in my head. And frankly after visiting the larger, corporate places, I knew it wasn't that. After our first school tour, I was really upset. I figured it was just because "I" was having a hard time with the idea of Elliott being left in someone else's care. That it was something "I" was going to have to get used to and get over. The school was nice (if not a bit sterile...and not in a bacterial way), the kids well-behaved and the staff was really nice. But the class seemed too large to me (twelve kids per teacher - the state maximum, by the way). That's a lot of 2 year olds for one teacher, especially when I feel they are still at an age where they need a lot of guidance.

I kept thinking about an incident that happened at Gymboree...a class where not only do we have a teacher, but every child also has their own person with them: The teacher was giving out high-fives to each child for helping to clean up the maracas. There were about 7 kids in the class that day. One little girl went to get her high-five, but was standing in the teacher's blind spot. So the teacher never saw her when she turned to put the maraca bin away. The little girl started to cry (high-fives are a really big deal if you didn't know! ;).  But, her mom was there and explained to her what happened and that it was going to be okay. I kept thinking about her as we looked at schools. How can one teacher give 12, 2 year olds what they need? What would have happened if that same incident had happened in preschool...only no one was there to comfort the little girl because no one saw what happened? And how would the teacher treat someone crying, when they didn't know why and the child might not be able to explain why? It made me almost want to cry.

And that is how we knew when we found the right place. We visited a little private preschool affiliated with a local church. It was a small school and didn't have the lock-down procedures we saw at the corporate schools. But we also quickly realized why they weren't necessary...because the teachers knew you. There were 12 kids per class (one class each for 2, 3, 4, and 5 year olds)...but each class had two teachers! Each class had its own area, but they were all apart of the one large classroom, roughly divided by low standing cubbies and bookshelves. And the outside area was by far THE BEST one we saw. So many fun things to do!  Things weren't perfectly band new, but it didn't matter.

When we went into the 2 year old class, they were in the middle of free-choice time. There were 4-5 kids at an art table with one teacher doing something with green glitter :)  There were another couple kids at a different table putting puzzles together. And one laying on the floor looking at books. And this was the biggest difference to me, the kids looks SO happy. They didn't look 'managed'. They looked engaged. I instantly could see Elliott there, happy.  When we had a chance to talk, both Brad and I turned to each other and said this is the place!

Now, I also want to take a moment to talk about money. This is mostly for me for my records, but for some of you who don't know how much childcare costs these days, you might find it interesting as well.  We went into this knowing that while price will always be a consideration, we weren't going to make this choice purely on cost alone. We knew how much we could afford (and I use this term loosely...because frankly we can't afford it) based on what Brad was going to get for 'school expenses' and we didn't look at any of the places we knew would be out of our price range (...which worked out because those places tend to have much more complicated enrollment procedures and most deadlines had long since passed). Anyway, rough ballpark, it was going to cost us about $1000 per month for Elliott to go to school 3 days a week, full-time at the larger, corporate preschools. But our little school is going to cost about $640 :)

I think my favorite part about this whole process was Brad's comment after we had toured the inside of Elliott's preschool...We were outside looking around and I said - I LOVE it here. He was like, well don't get your hopes up yet, we don't know how much its going to cost. I said - I do! (I had printed out their price sheet ahead of time. I love the transparency about this place, too!) He said, how much more is it from the other place? To which I responded - its not! its cheaper! He was shocked :)

Elliott is set to start the second week of September. This will give Elliott a chance to get settled in school before Brad starts as well as give Brad the time to go to his orientation and get his other school-starting errands done (there's a lot to do when you start at a new university - sheesh!).  I know there will be an adjustment period for Elliott and I am preparing myself for that. But I also know he is going to love school. He is so interested in other kids right now and he is starting to learn how to interact with them and wants to, too! I also love that he has already learned about teachers via Gymboree and knows to look to them for guidance, reassurance and feedback.

I am so excited for Elliott to start this chapter of his life. Both Brad and I know he is going to thrive in school :)

Weekly Retrospective 8/7-8/13/11

Weekly Retrospective 7/31-8/6/11

Weekly Retrospective 7/24-7/30/11

Weekly Retrospective 7/17-7/23/11

Winning the Lottery

There has been a lot going on behind the scenes here lately. For those of you who don't already know, we are moving! Holy cow. We have lived in our current place since March 2001 (which is a lot of time to fill a place up). We have thought about moving several different times over the last 10 years, but we always stayed put. Always decided it was more trouble than it was worth.

We've been wanting to buy something for a long time and we thought we were getting really close (we still are, compared to where we were 4 years ago - Hello, Housing Market of Insanity), but with a static income and raising inflation in every other aspects of our lives (groceries, gas, health insurance, etc, etc), we aren't quite there yet. Neither Brad or I have any desire to be house poor. We know the right time to buy will come (heck its almost here!), but if we live where we can (almost) afford to buy today, we can't afford to commute to where the rest of our lives are right now. And if we buy where our lives are centered, we can't afford the mortgage. So we are still waiting.

BUT! That doesn't mean there aren't some interesting alternatives in the meantime! One of the (many!!) benefits available to Brad as a student at UCSD, is his access to student housing. We had talked about putting ourselves on (the very long) wait-list as soon as he was eligible and as the time came, it turned out having Elliott provided a perk beyond his cute personality and winning smile: Brad gained top priority in housing!

Now we aren't talking about dorms or on-campus apartments you share with other people.  UCSD has an extensive 'affiliated housing' program for qualifying students and faculty.  I always had called these units 'married student housing' when I was a student, because that's pretty much who lived there.  The complexes are off-campus and depending on your circumstances you are eligible to apply for certain units. You are then placed on a wait-list and you get access to a spot based on priority, single people with no roommates have lowest priority and families have highest!

Most of the units in the complexes available to us are two bedrooms...but, there are also a few choice three bedroom units as well (think 9, 3-bedrooms compared to 678, 2-bedroom units).  Brad was eligible for 2-bedroom unit almost immediately (0-3 month wait) and the 3-bedrooms had a wait-list of about a year for families. Unfortunately, it also turned out that the 3-bedrooms units are further broken down with priority given to applicants with 3 or more children, regardless of how long someone was on the list. So, if someone had 3+ kids, they always get first dibs, then 2 kids, then 1 kid, then couples. So basically, it was highly improbably to get one of these 3-bedroom units with 1 child.

Now, what is the advantage to living in one of these complexes, you might ask? It all comes down to money. The complexes are operated by the university. They aren't subsidized housing, but the university isn't in the apartment management business either, so they also aren't trying to make a profit. The rent taken in, is what they use to run and maintain the complexes (or at least this is what the official statement is).  This means, that Brad and I can afford to live close to campus (AND close to my office!!), without having to pay the premium of living in the area. A comparable (non-affiliated) unit to what we live in now, would probably go for about $400 more a month than what we are paying currently. A 3-bedroom would probably go for about $1000+ more than our current rent. However, the affiliated housing rents for a 2-bedroom are currently $200 LESS than what we are paying and the 3-bedroom is $100 less! Add in gas savings and convenience (there's a shuttle stop within the complex that goes directly to campus!) - talk about a difference!

So we decided to go for it. Despite turning one 2-bedroom into another (something we NEVER intended to do), we thought it would be worth it to move...then camp out on the wait-list for a 3-bedroom unit. It was very nerve wracking to know you were going to be moving, but not know when. We could have got a call anytime. We were really hoping it would be before school started for Brad and before school started for Elliott (!! - more on this in another post!).  I was dreading a move right after Brad's first quarter begins, since I knew that would mean so much more stress for me and loss of focus for Brad.  And despite knowing what our chances were of getting a 3-bedroom, we still listed it as our bottom preference (out of our three preferences) on our wait-list application. What the heck, right? 

So, can you guess where this is going? :D  The day we came back from vacation, Brad got a voice-mail. He was in the other room and I could here this "HUH! OMG! Um...O - M - G!"  Then he came into where we were with wide eyes, trying to fumble with his phone to get it on speaker and replay the message. I was like "WHAT? WHAT?" And then it dawned on me what was happening...and I said "NO! YOUR KIDDING!" 

WE GOT A 3-BEDROOM!!

And we took it - more or less sight unseen. And as I am writing this, we still haven't been inside. We got the address, so before we turned in our acceptance letter, we did see the unit from the outside. It's downstairs (I was petrified of living with a running toddler - and I do believe toddlers should be able to run around in their own homes - over anyone without kids), which was a major relief. We were also able to look into a couple windows: the kitchen (I can't tell you how happy I am to have a window in my kitchen - and the window trumps the fact that there's even darker (what!?!) butcher block laminate on the cupboards than what we already have) and two of the bedrooms.  The two bedrooms were good sized, so even if the 3rd is smaller, it will all be fine. I have no idea about anything else. I don't know anything about the living room or dining room, but I think that they may be on the small side from what I saw of another unit's open window while we were there.

What I do know is this: 

a) there is grass...everywhere.
b) there are families, something our current complex is lacking.
c) we have our own playground.
d) there's walking trails throughout the complex.
e) we have our own community garden.
f) we have our own coffee shop.
g) electricity comes with our rent.
h) Elliott will have his own room :)
i) which means, mommy and daddy will have their own room!
j) we are ecstatic!

Weekly Retrospective 7/10-7/16/11

Weekly Retrospective 7/3-7/9/11

More from the Kitchen

I've been meaning to share this video for a while. Elliott was gifted this little kitchenette from our friends who saw it in a neighbor's garage sale and thought of him :)  Needless to say, he's put it to a lot of good use. Pooh is usually very full. And everything takes "4 minutes"!  This particular video also cracks me up, because he had to stop for a 'poop break'. heh.

Its also funny because this video was from June 13. I already see so many changes! He talks so much clearer now (and more, too!) and he looks so young! Hopefully this will teach me not to doddle too much in the future!

Weekly Retrospective 6/26-7/2/11

First Family 'Vacation'

I had mentioned in a previous post that we were looking to take a little family vacation this summer. Well an opportunity came through one of those 'daily deal' emails for a two-night getaway to Oxnard. I didn't even know where that was, but the reference to 'Channel Islands' caught my attention. It ended up being about an hour outside of L.A. and close to the water so it fit the bill perfectly for what I was looking for: beachy, not too far away, and someplace we hadn't been before.

Overall the trip was really nice. We went up on a Sunday and met up with our friends in LA, which gave Elliott a chance to stretch his legs.

Motorcycle Riding

Our kids haven't been able to spend much time together (even less so since they've been old enough to interact with each other), so it was nice for them to have a chance to play. Lucy even let Elliott borrow her car...which I'm pretty sure has never been honked so much in its entire existance.

Playing with Lucy

We also took the opportunity while we were in LA to visit one of Brad's favorite places to eat: Phillipe's. Shan had never been either so she joined us for dinner, too!  It's one of those places, where I never want to go, but I'm always glad Brad makes me. It is so delicious! I just have to get my head around driving into downtown LA first :P

Waiting for dinner at Phillipe's in L.A.

The next day we took our time getting our bearings since we really had no idea what was in Oxnard other than the beach and a harbor that takes you to the Channel Islands. We would have gone out there if we had stayed one more day, but we didn't want to be super rushy or planny, so we skipped it this time around.

The harbor was beautiful - so many boats! And the beaches were really great. Tons of sand, sand dunes and no body around!! My kind of beach! We walked around the beach in the late morning, then headed to the wharf for lunch.

Sand Tractors - these things were huge!

Walking the dunes

Elliott kept reaching under my sunglasses to use my eyes to hold on!

  

Looking at the boats

Resting

"Sail Boat!"

We saw a seal swimming in the inlet, so we had to take a picture to commemorate.

The wharf was actually really sad. There was pretty much just a couple places left besides the maritime museum. We ate fish and chips and looked at the crabs...so many crabs!

At lunch, deep in conversation :)

crabs - need I say more?

This sign is for you, Auntie Meagan!

On our way out we walked through the maritime museum where they had the most amazing boat models I have ever seen. The detail was extraordinary. The man who built them all for the museum made them from the original plans and hand fabricated EVERYTHING. There was also a few things Elliott could touch and the host even let Elliott ring the bell :) (He was a funny, piratey old man, who surprisingly enough had heard of Elliott's namesake, and seemed to think Elliott was about 5 years old - he was always surprised when Elliott didn't laugh at his jokes.)

One of the many extraordinary models at the maritime museum and E's 'only with your eyes' hands :)

The sad state of affairs at the wharf. One of the many long-closed businesses.

We then spent a little time at a really nice pirate-themed playground, then headed back to the beach for a little time in the sand.

Playground fun!

It was pretty windy by this point, so we didn't get too close to the water. Elliott wanted to make 'castles' which he remembered from going to the beach with Aunt Karen, grandma and grandpa. I felt bad, because I knew nothing would hold its shape when we dumped over the bucket, but Elliott didn't seem to mind. He still exclaimed 'castle!!!" when we ended up with a lovely sand pile ;)

Building castles

Fortunately mounds of sand satisfied his 'castle craving' - heh

As for the practical aspects of out first family vacation, well, it was challenging to say the least. The hotel room was beyond anything Elliott could comprehend. It was full of new things to mess with and he pretty much ran around the room getting into anything and everything he could find. The first night was tough, too. He cried on and off pretty much all night and asked to go home :( (Needless to say, mama made have teared up a bit herself at this.)  He ended up sleeping with us, so I was really glad we had that king size bed! Then being overtired, made for even more hyperness the next day. Unfortunately, we also had a neighbor downstairs the second night who didn't take kindly to toddler footsteps and actually started banging on the walls after Elliott made a couple passes around the room. He tried really hard to not run. He would make these exaggerated tip toe steps (ha!), but then something would catch his eye and he was off! Ugh. Note to self - request a downstairs room like the family checking-in in front of us did (and now I know why!).

Despite the above, I'm really glad we went. I loved that we were able to see so much in such a short amount of time. And I also love that I took another day off work after we got back (to celebrate out 14th anniversary!!), which meant we had plenty of time for normal errandy stuff before going back to work.