The last week or so has been very reflective. Its strange to think about what was going on just a year ago. This time last year I was on my way to Mary Birch to get checked out after our unexpected ultrasound results. Little did we know that visit would park me in a hospital for 9 days and on bedrest for nearly 10 weeks.
When you go through something like that, you don't really have any other choice but to steel yourself and deal with it. That's not to say there weren't some hard days, but what does feeling sorry for yourself accomplish? In my experience, it generally just makes things worse, so its better to roll with the punches and make the best of the situation.
What I didn't expect was how traumatic looking back on it all would be. The scariest day, well night really, was the night I was admitted into the hospital. We obviously didn't know exactly what was going to happen, but they had made it seem like I was going to be monitored overnight and would be on bestrest the rest of the pregnancy. Since it was Thanksgiving weekend, there were a ton of people there (trying to deliver before the weekend...how that works, I have no idea ;) and no spare partner sleeping chairs. We thought that since I was just in for monitoring and Brad had no place to sleep, it would be fine if he slept at home. Unfortunately, it didn't really play out like we expected. I ended up undergoing a series of very scary tests, was given an IV for the first time (which almost put me over the edge), and had a very intensive ultrasound by the perinatologist. This was also when I realized I might not be going home anytime soon. I remember willing myself not to cry, wishing that Brad was with me, and feeling very, very alone.
I also look back on my bedrest with absolute amazement. I don't know how I did it. There was a point, I didn't leave the house for two weeks! And its not like I had full use of our house either. But except for a couple particularly hard days, there wasn't anything to do but make the best of it. When I think about the idea of laying down for 9+ weeks, I actually get a bit claustrophobic now. But I didn't feel that way at the time. I guess a lot of it was just being so thankful I was still pregnant. Plus, I had a very important job to do.
However, I would be remiss if I didn't fully acknowledge that it was only possible because of the help of others. We got through it because of so much thoughtfulness and downright elbow grease...after all it wasn't exactly like we were ready for a baby anytime soon...and our place was pretty much trashed.
So in honor of this Thanksgiving Holiday, we are saying 'thanks' to everyone who made that time bearable, passable, manageable, and tolerable. And 'thanks' to everyone who helped us this year as we brought Elliott home, became parents and began our life as a family. We couldn't have done this without you either!
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Happy Inside-Out Day Elliott!
Elliott has officially been with us on the 'outside' as long as he was with us on the 'inside'. A silly thing to commemorate really, but kinda fun, too! ;)
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Guess who's not wearing maternity pants today!
Well, it certainly isn't Shan! ;) But, yes, this is my first day in non-maternity pants - yippy! They aren't my jeans, but those are also getting close. And, yes, I used to have to wear these pants with a belt, but heck, I really don't care. :)
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Elliott's Birth Story
As you may remember, I was sent home from Mary Birch on Wednesday the 4th with strict orders for left-side only bedrest. Unfortunately, when I returned to the doctor's office on Friday, my blood pressure was even higher than it had been at the office on Wednesday. I was also 3 cm dilated and nearly 100% effaced, so the other OB in the office highly recommended that we get him out. She was very concerned that the pregnancy induced hypertention would develop into more serious complications over the weekend and given that I was already 39 weeks and my cervix was ready to go, she felt the induction would be a simple matter and something we shouldn't even be questioning. She also had a more personal interest in the safety of our little one as she had recently suffered a late stage pregnancy loss. And from that perspective, we had to agree. What was the most important thing here? Have an all natural hypno-birth or have a healthy baby and mom? While I never wanted medical intervention, we did feel that there was a time and a place for everything and this was the way we needed to go for our safety.
39 weeks and 1 day pregnant
39 weeks and 1 day pregnantWe ate lunch and went home to grab a few last minute things since we didn't know how long we would be gone. Fortunately, the car was still mostly packed from Wednesday. We ended up back at the hospital around 3:30 and by the time we got checked in (they direct admitted me so we were able to skip the very long triage stage of the admission process) and my IV hooked up (I needed to start my strep B antibiotics as soon as possible, since I needed at least 2 doses, 4 hours apart), it was 4:30pm. I remembered this clearly because I knew I needed to get to at least 8:30 in order to get the second dose of my antibiotics.
We opted to induce labor using pitocin through my IV. The other option was to break my water, but that meant that I more or less had 24 hours to deliver once that happened. I didn't want to be put on a time clock from the beginning if at all possible, so we went the pitocin route. I knew that this would bring on fast strong contractions, which I wasn't looking forward to and I had to acknowledge to myself that getting an epidual might be necessary. However, we were still determined to do things as naturally as we could. So once the pitocin started, we proceeded with our labor preparation as if it was all happening on its own.
Things are a little blurry timewise from here on out and I know Brad remembers things happening differently. All I can do is recount what I remember as best I can. I know that I made it through the first of a two-part hypno-babies recording that you are only supposed to listen to on the day of delivery. This took at least 40 minutes. They also told me that my blood work had come back and things had looked good, so that was a plus as well. I remember not wanting to do the other recording and was just trying to relax. I still wasn't feeling any affects of the pitocin when I felt a really strange feeling, almost as if 'Lloyd' had done a complete backflip and then I felt a pop. My water had broken on its own. We let the nurse know and she came and confirmed that is what had happened.
Almost instantaneously the labor contractions started (I had been having about 8 an hour but wasn't feeling them up to this point). It seemed like they were about 2 minutes apart from the very begining and they were very intense but nothing like the contractions I had experienced in the hospital back in November. Those were like a wave that would start from one side of my belly, roll across to the other side and then come back when the contraction subsided. The contractions I was now experiencing were like severe menstrual cramps, almost as if my uterus was back to its normal size and place and someone was squeezing it really hard.
I breathed through many of these, but the pain was very intense and the became faster and faster. The nurses started to scale back the pitocin to see if my body would continue on its own...it did. Pretty soon I was pitocin-free but still experiencing very fast and intense contractions. I was starting to question if I could deal with the pushing phase if I couldn't even take these! I opted to try a pain mediciation to 'take the edge off' that was short acting and added directly to my IV. It was supposed to have very little effect on the baby since it was short lived and would be stopped prior to pushing. This stuff did nothing. I think maybe two contractions were easier to deal with, but then they were back to full strength. The nurse helped me change position into a sitting position which did help some with pain, but it soon became intense again.
I remember holding Brad's hands and telling him that I think I needed to get the epidural but I was also scared to get it as well. I also remember thinking that according to the Bradley Method if I was feeling I couldn't do anymore, I probably was almost ready to push. A few contractions latter, I started to feel like I wanted to push and that I had to (sorry) poop. The nurse was really happy to hear this because apparently this also means that I was almost ready. She checked me and sure enough I was 10 cm.
About this time by body just took over. The feeling to push was overwhelming and involuntary. Each contraction, which now felt like someone was squeezing my colon (again, sorry ;) , would announce one to three waves in which my body would bare down on its own. I was really loud. I remember groaning and almost screaming, but not in pain. Brad thought I was in the biggest pain of my life, but really it didn't hurt. The contractions didn't hurt either. It was just the most overwhelming physical activity I have ever experienced. Pretty soon the doctor was in and they started getting the room ready for the delivery. The doctor, who ended up being the same doctor who had admitted me to the hospital back in November, noticed that I had a small cervical lip and was concerned if I continued pushing that I would get really tired. I was already physically exhausted given my lack of activity of the last few months.
They repositioned the bed into a chair and had me lean forward to help gravity bring him down. It worked. I tried not to push, but it was hard to control my body and pretty soon I felt like I was sitting on 'Lloyd's' head. I kept sitting on one hip and I told the nurse I was sitting on him. She got the doctor back in and within what seemed like a couple minutes, what had previously been a normal hospital room was now all green and everyone was dressed in green scrubs with drop cloths and face shields.
Now, I have no idea how long it took to get to all of these points. I feel like the entire labor took about an hour. I do remember looking at the clock at one point and seeing that it was only 8:00pm and thinking things were going too fast and that there wasn't going to be time for my second dose of antibiotics. Fortuntely, things took exactly the right amount of time. And the next thing I knew there were something like 8 people in the room and the nurse, the doctor and Brad were coaching me through each push. Brad kept telling me how good I was doing and would hold me between contractions. I was also breathing really fast because of the physical effort. The doctor had me breathe oxygen from a mask between contractions but it was the most annoying thing EVER. I kept pushing the mask out of the way. I was also really annoyed by my hospital gown and I remember tugging on it and if there hadn't been so many people in there I probably would have just taken it off...although modesty in this situation? really?
I remember the last couple contractions starting to hurt as the doctor said his head was just crowning. And the next thing I knew I looked up and saw 'Lloyd' literally fly out of me. Not in two steps (head, then body) like we had seen in so many birthing videos, but all at once, so that the doctor actually had to catch him! Ha! I looked down and could see him and he was kinda blue, but after a little bit, I could see him moving, they took him back to the warmer and Brad went with them. After another little bit he started crying. I just remember saying 'oh, baby! oh, baby!' over and over and crying.
The placenta came out really quickly and was not nearly as disturbing looking as I was expecting (I asked to see it...I was so curious!) and then the doctor started stitching me up :( Yes, I tore and it wasn't until the next day that I found out that I had earned myself a partial 3rd degree tear (which goes into the muscle layer). I think the stitches hurt more than the actual labor! The doctor was just about done with me when they brought our little boy back over to me to hold for the first time.
The room slowly started getting back to normal and the people started leaving as they each finished their duties. Within just a few minutes they had brought me some food and it was just me, Brad and our nurse. We were able to call our parents fairly quickly and let them know. And then the nurse took 'Lloyd' back and she and Brad did all the measuring and weighing while I ate a turkey sandwich (perhaps the most sureal part of the whole experience ;)
Not all that long later, I had him back in my arms and we tried our first attempt at nursing, which was probably pretty comical to watch. And he was so alert! He just kept looking at everything! The nurses even commented on it and said it was probably because I hadn't had an epidural.
By about 11:00pm we were moved up to the recovery room that would be the room I had for the next couple days. I was so happy to see that they had given me a private room even though the insurance only guaranteed a semi-private. Both Brad and I were exhausted but totally wired at the same time. It took another couple hours before we could even contemplate sleeping. Luckily 'Lloyd' slept in a few good chunks that first night and we were able to get some rest.
Unforunately, we still had one difficult thing left to decide - his name! People kept asking and all I knew what that most of the names on our 'favorite' list just didn't seem to suit him. It wasn't until the next day that I remembered Elliott had been on our larger list and it just seemed to fit him. Brad was talking to his sister on the phone about names at the time and I mouthed - what about Elliott? And he was like - Yeah! So Elliott it was!
Thursday, February 5, 2009
*This* Close!
Yesterday almost went very differently then expected...meaning, we almost had a baby. At my regular doctor's appointment, they found that my blood pressure was doing some screwy things. It was higher when I was sitting up, but lower again as soon as I would lie down. Because there is a serious risk of pregnancy induced hypertension in first pregnancies (which can cut off oxygen and other nutrient supplies to the baby), my OB took it very seriously.
I ended up back at Mary Birch Hospital for monitoring and testing. Basically, if my testing came back positive for hypertension, they were going to induce labor to get him out. Things were going well on my end until, unfortunately, Lloyd had a little dip in his heart rate at one point during the monitoring. At this point my doctor told the triage nurse that she was going to come in and break my water. Ugh. We were still waiting on the results of my blood tests when they officially admitted me to the hospital.
I was sent upstairs to labor and delivery and the nurses got me settled into bed. In the meantime, Brad ran home to get our hospital bag (which I finished packing that afternoon!) and arrange for my mom to pick up Jenny. All I can say is that the L&D nurses at Mary Birch are AWESOME! As soon as they heard we had taken hypnobirthing training, they started planning which nurse should be assigned to me as well as looking at my test results and what was going on with me. Turns out all my blood work came back fine, I was barely having any contractions and Lloyd hadn't had any other abnormalities in his recordings. The nurses knew I didn't want to be unnecessarily induced and they also knew that if the doctor broke my water I would have 24 hours to deliver...which was unlikely to happen given my labor progress and without being induced...meaning I would have been on a fast track for a C-section.
The nurses took my case back to the doctor and she agreed to let me go home as long as I went back on fully restricted left-side only bedrest. Hey - no problem!! I'm supposed to then go back to the doctor on Friday and if my blood pressure is still funky, then she wants to induce...but at least she's giving me some more time. The good thing is that if we do end up needing to go the induction route, I am already 2cm dilated and 90% effaced...so a lot of the work has already been done or at least started.
The thing is, I feel fine. I didn't feel like I was in labor last night and felt rediculous being in a labor & delivery room. I'm showing signs of various prelabor activity (dilating, loss of mucus plug, cramping, lower pelvic pressure - although this is nothing new for me, baby's low, and increased exhaustion), so I know that labor will be happening in the near future. But prelabor can be a day, days or even longer. As long as Lloyd and I are ultimately fine, I'd much rather let nature take its course. Afterall, our bodies go through all these stages for a reason and I see no reason to fast track anything unless there is a true medical necessity.
So for now, I'm back to laying down and trying to relax, so that hopefully everything will look okay to the doctor tomorrow. My biggest concern at this point is that we are going to be seeing our OB's partner, so again we will have another person and their potentially very different opinions chiming in. Because of this, we have decided to also start the natural methods of labor induction today to make medicated induction go a little better if it turns out we need to go that route. Our hypnobirthing instructor gave us a laundry list of things to do, many of them super easy like massaging my achillies heel or pressing on my baby toe nail. However, I won't be climbing stairs or walking up our massive hill since that would prove while laying on my left side! So for now, wish us luck and we will have an update, one way or another, here pretty soon!
I ended up back at Mary Birch Hospital for monitoring and testing. Basically, if my testing came back positive for hypertension, they were going to induce labor to get him out. Things were going well on my end until, unfortunately, Lloyd had a little dip in his heart rate at one point during the monitoring. At this point my doctor told the triage nurse that she was going to come in and break my water. Ugh. We were still waiting on the results of my blood tests when they officially admitted me to the hospital.
I was sent upstairs to labor and delivery and the nurses got me settled into bed. In the meantime, Brad ran home to get our hospital bag (which I finished packing that afternoon!) and arrange for my mom to pick up Jenny. All I can say is that the L&D nurses at Mary Birch are AWESOME! As soon as they heard we had taken hypnobirthing training, they started planning which nurse should be assigned to me as well as looking at my test results and what was going on with me. Turns out all my blood work came back fine, I was barely having any contractions and Lloyd hadn't had any other abnormalities in his recordings. The nurses knew I didn't want to be unnecessarily induced and they also knew that if the doctor broke my water I would have 24 hours to deliver...which was unlikely to happen given my labor progress and without being induced...meaning I would have been on a fast track for a C-section.
The nurses took my case back to the doctor and she agreed to let me go home as long as I went back on fully restricted left-side only bedrest. Hey - no problem!! I'm supposed to then go back to the doctor on Friday and if my blood pressure is still funky, then she wants to induce...but at least she's giving me some more time. The good thing is that if we do end up needing to go the induction route, I am already 2cm dilated and 90% effaced...so a lot of the work has already been done or at least started.
The thing is, I feel fine. I didn't feel like I was in labor last night and felt rediculous being in a labor & delivery room. I'm showing signs of various prelabor activity (dilating, loss of mucus plug, cramping, lower pelvic pressure - although this is nothing new for me, baby's low, and increased exhaustion), so I know that labor will be happening in the near future. But prelabor can be a day, days or even longer. As long as Lloyd and I are ultimately fine, I'd much rather let nature take its course. Afterall, our bodies go through all these stages for a reason and I see no reason to fast track anything unless there is a true medical necessity.
So for now, I'm back to laying down and trying to relax, so that hopefully everything will look okay to the doctor tomorrow. My biggest concern at this point is that we are going to be seeing our OB's partner, so again we will have another person and their potentially very different opinions chiming in. Because of this, we have decided to also start the natural methods of labor induction today to make medicated induction go a little better if it turns out we need to go that route. Our hypnobirthing instructor gave us a laundry list of things to do, many of them super easy like massaging my achillies heel or pressing on my baby toe nail. However, I won't be climbing stairs or walking up our massive hill since that would prove while laying on my left side! So for now, wish us luck and we will have an update, one way or another, here pretty soon!
Thursday, January 29, 2009
38 weeks!
Wow - that week went fast! Considering it was one of the more crucial weeks...we are after all trying to get to Saturday (the shower) without a baby ;-) It was also my first week off bedrest, so I was really interested to see how the increased activity would shake things up!
Unfortunately, I didn't see my regular doctor this week, so I really have no idea how things went. The nurse practitioner said that she thought I was 1 cm dilated, 50% effaced and at -2 station (which means he's farther up...and thus farther away from delivery time) - literally one step forward, 2 steps back! But then, its all so subjective, since its done by touch and not with any regulated measuring tool. I'll have a better idea when I go back to my regular doctor next week.
38 weeks
So how did things change? Well, I started driving again...which was crazy to think that it had been almost exactly 2 months since the last time I drove. Its a little challenging to get in and out of my car, but believe it or not, its actually easier to drive the Miata than the Rabbit since I'm more reclined. I also ran a couple errands this week as well as drove myself to the doctors office on Tuesday. I still don't do too much while I'm out, but its nice to have that freedom again.
I've also been able to help out a bit around the house. I've fixed the occational meal (usually just heating something up), unloaded the dishwasher and even straightened up a bit. Brad's still doing all the heavy lifting, but its nice that I can at least contribute again!
My mom also took me to Babies R Us on Saturday where we were able to pick up a couple of the essentials - he now has a place to sleep (thanks Mary!) and he got some wheels (thanks mom!). We also made it to a yarn shop in LaMesa so that I could pick up some yarn to start a new project as well as a nice Indian lunch! It was so much fun to be out and about!
On the crafting front, I have been making some really fun knitting progress lately. While not all of these things took place last week, I have finished up a new sweater for me, a couple accessories and some new baby knits.
I don't have much on the books for the next couple days, which is nice and means that I'll be all rested up and ready for the shower on Saturday! I can hardly wait!
Unfortunately, I didn't see my regular doctor this week, so I really have no idea how things went. The nurse practitioner said that she thought I was 1 cm dilated, 50% effaced and at -2 station (which means he's farther up...and thus farther away from delivery time) - literally one step forward, 2 steps back! But then, its all so subjective, since its done by touch and not with any regulated measuring tool. I'll have a better idea when I go back to my regular doctor next week.
38 weeksSo how did things change? Well, I started driving again...which was crazy to think that it had been almost exactly 2 months since the last time I drove. Its a little challenging to get in and out of my car, but believe it or not, its actually easier to drive the Miata than the Rabbit since I'm more reclined. I also ran a couple errands this week as well as drove myself to the doctors office on Tuesday. I still don't do too much while I'm out, but its nice to have that freedom again.
I've also been able to help out a bit around the house. I've fixed the occational meal (usually just heating something up), unloaded the dishwasher and even straightened up a bit. Brad's still doing all the heavy lifting, but its nice that I can at least contribute again!
My mom also took me to Babies R Us on Saturday where we were able to pick up a couple of the essentials - he now has a place to sleep (thanks Mary!) and he got some wheels (thanks mom!). We also made it to a yarn shop in LaMesa so that I could pick up some yarn to start a new project as well as a nice Indian lunch! It was so much fun to be out and about!
On the crafting front, I have been making some really fun knitting progress lately. While not all of these things took place last week, I have finished up a new sweater for me, a couple accessories and some new baby knits.
I don't have much on the books for the next couple days, which is nice and means that I'll be all rested up and ready for the shower on Saturday! I can hardly wait!
Thursday, January 22, 2009
37 weeks...and counting!
We made it! Lloyd is officially considered full-term as of today! I have to admit, I got a little teary eyed when I opened up my Babycenter.com update email for this week. We have come so far and I can hardly believe it has been 8 weeks since I was admitted to the hospital!!
We also made it to our OB visit yesterday where she let us know that my cervix is still closed, I am 80% effaced and Lloyd's at zero station. Basically this means that my cervix is softening again, which is totally normal at this point and Lloyd's head is hanging out on my cervix. I've also gained 27 pounds since being pregnant...which is showing in my face a bit.
37 weeks
The OB also formally ordered me off of bedrest. We let her know that we wanted to stay on it so that we can get him as close to his due date as possible, but she explained that there are several complications for me that can arrise as a result of extended bedrest (including blood clots, swelling, etc.) and that at this point it is riskier for me to be on bedrest than it is for Lloyd to be born now. This made since to us and so we decided that I will just gradually start doing more. As it was, I had already started doing more things like get my own water or the occational snack, while Brad did all the regular meals and house chores. I was also limiting showers to every other day to keep down on that effort...even though I do have that groovy shower chair to use!
So, yesterday while I didn't go for a formal walk like she suggested (after all we still aren't in any rush to get him out and I do need to get my strength back...I get tired and winded really easily), we did go out for dinner and I actually went to the grocery store to get dessert after! It was funny, because it was really hard to eat sitting up at a 90 degree angle. It almost hurt and I kept wanting to lay over in the booth to rest. By the time we were done with dinner, I was exhausted! But it was so nice to be out! I also took another shower this morning and we went to the library to get a DVD I had requested. I feel like there's nothing wrong doing these things and still taking it easy around the house. After all, I am 37 weeks pregnant! I wouldn't be doing a lot of things at this point under the most normal of circumstances, so there is no reason for me to feel like I have to act like I'm not pregnant and push too much. I figure, I can do more things around here, but if I get tired or he starts to put a ton of pressure on my pelvis, I will sit down!
I also have to say that with the news of how I was progressing and where Lloyd was at this point, I got really excited. I feel like I can say that I am mentally ready. I got excited about getting a few of the birthing preparations completed (birth plan, hospital bag, etc.) and once we make it through next week (Brad is super crazy busy next week and we have a baby shower on the 31st :-), he can come whenever he likes! It will be so nice to feel like when things start happening this time, they can actually happen! Also, the calm that I was feeling about labor as a result of our HypnoBirthing preparations has started to come back and I'm really looking forward to meeting this little guy!
Me moving around more is also good for Jenny. I noticed several times today that she got a little ticked at me when I wasn't sitting on the couch. Obviously she will get over this, but it is nice that she can start to adjust to our normal life before she also has to adjust to having a baby around the house.
And if you think that she is a bit spoiled, you would be right...I mean, look at this face?
We also made it to our OB visit yesterday where she let us know that my cervix is still closed, I am 80% effaced and Lloyd's at zero station. Basically this means that my cervix is softening again, which is totally normal at this point and Lloyd's head is hanging out on my cervix. I've also gained 27 pounds since being pregnant...which is showing in my face a bit.
37 weeksThe OB also formally ordered me off of bedrest. We let her know that we wanted to stay on it so that we can get him as close to his due date as possible, but she explained that there are several complications for me that can arrise as a result of extended bedrest (including blood clots, swelling, etc.) and that at this point it is riskier for me to be on bedrest than it is for Lloyd to be born now. This made since to us and so we decided that I will just gradually start doing more. As it was, I had already started doing more things like get my own water or the occational snack, while Brad did all the regular meals and house chores. I was also limiting showers to every other day to keep down on that effort...even though I do have that groovy shower chair to use!
So, yesterday while I didn't go for a formal walk like she suggested (after all we still aren't in any rush to get him out and I do need to get my strength back...I get tired and winded really easily), we did go out for dinner and I actually went to the grocery store to get dessert after! It was funny, because it was really hard to eat sitting up at a 90 degree angle. It almost hurt and I kept wanting to lay over in the booth to rest. By the time we were done with dinner, I was exhausted! But it was so nice to be out! I also took another shower this morning and we went to the library to get a DVD I had requested. I feel like there's nothing wrong doing these things and still taking it easy around the house. After all, I am 37 weeks pregnant! I wouldn't be doing a lot of things at this point under the most normal of circumstances, so there is no reason for me to feel like I have to act like I'm not pregnant and push too much. I figure, I can do more things around here, but if I get tired or he starts to put a ton of pressure on my pelvis, I will sit down!
I also have to say that with the news of how I was progressing and where Lloyd was at this point, I got really excited. I feel like I can say that I am mentally ready. I got excited about getting a few of the birthing preparations completed (birth plan, hospital bag, etc.) and once we make it through next week (Brad is super crazy busy next week and we have a baby shower on the 31st :-), he can come whenever he likes! It will be so nice to feel like when things start happening this time, they can actually happen! Also, the calm that I was feeling about labor as a result of our HypnoBirthing preparations has started to come back and I'm really looking forward to meeting this little guy!
Me moving around more is also good for Jenny. I noticed several times today that she got a little ticked at me when I wasn't sitting on the couch. Obviously she will get over this, but it is nice that she can start to adjust to our normal life before she also has to adjust to having a baby around the house.
And if you think that she is a bit spoiled, you would be right...I mean, look at this face?
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Sleep
Ever since we told my friend Mimi about us being pregnant, she has joked about the fact that we've had entirely too much sleep in the past ten years and often reminds us to rest up now! Unfortunately, me and sleep are no longer on speaking terms. I've always slept well...well at least as long as I can remember (I can't really comment on my super early days). I fall asleep fast and could probably count my bad nights (during my adult life) on both hands. Sleep is just not usually a problem for me...unlike a certain sleeping partner I have.
But the last few weeks have been rough. I'm up every one to two hours to rotate positions from one side to the other when my lower hip/thigh starts to hurt. This is no easy process, I might add. I have pillows in strategic places on either side of me and the effort to move such a strangely shaped body is not exactly a walk in the park at the moment. And then, I might as well get up to go to the bathroom since if I don't I'll just wake up in another 15 minutes anyway...plus its just plain easier to rotate sides as part of getting back in bed. So that's bad enough, right? Well, lets add some insomnia. And boy, I have it all...can't get to sleep, can't stay asleep and up at the crack of dawn. There have been nights that I haven't been able to fall asleep until 3 or 4 in the morning, but awake again at 6 (usually starving, I might add). And if that's not enough?...can you add in some restless leg syndrome? Its common in pregnancy and seems to get me on nights I would otherwise be able to fall asleep...except for the fact that it feels like the skin on my legs is crawling.
All this means that I no longer enjoy going to bed at night (which makes me sad) because it just seems like what's the point? This has caused my regular bed time (usually between 10 and 11 pm) to slowly creep up to 1-2 am and even then I end up going to bed because it seems like I should, not because I'm tired. Last night was another bad one. By the time I actually got to sleep, I was wide awake every half hour or hour. I finally got to sleep around 8 am in time for the alarm to go off at 8:15...so we could get up and watch the inauguration. ugh.
So while you might argue this is clearly one of Mother Nature's cruelest jokes, I'm going to chalk it up to pregnancy preparation. I've decided that I can hardly wait until Lloyd gets here, because I would love to be able to sleep in two or three hour blocks again. How sad is that! ;)
But the last few weeks have been rough. I'm up every one to two hours to rotate positions from one side to the other when my lower hip/thigh starts to hurt. This is no easy process, I might add. I have pillows in strategic places on either side of me and the effort to move such a strangely shaped body is not exactly a walk in the park at the moment. And then, I might as well get up to go to the bathroom since if I don't I'll just wake up in another 15 minutes anyway...plus its just plain easier to rotate sides as part of getting back in bed. So that's bad enough, right? Well, lets add some insomnia. And boy, I have it all...can't get to sleep, can't stay asleep and up at the crack of dawn. There have been nights that I haven't been able to fall asleep until 3 or 4 in the morning, but awake again at 6 (usually starving, I might add). And if that's not enough?...can you add in some restless leg syndrome? Its common in pregnancy and seems to get me on nights I would otherwise be able to fall asleep...except for the fact that it feels like the skin on my legs is crawling.
All this means that I no longer enjoy going to bed at night (which makes me sad) because it just seems like what's the point? This has caused my regular bed time (usually between 10 and 11 pm) to slowly creep up to 1-2 am and even then I end up going to bed because it seems like I should, not because I'm tired. Last night was another bad one. By the time I actually got to sleep, I was wide awake every half hour or hour. I finally got to sleep around 8 am in time for the alarm to go off at 8:15...so we could get up and watch the inauguration. ugh.
So while you might argue this is clearly one of Mother Nature's cruelest jokes, I'm going to chalk it up to pregnancy preparation. I've decided that I can hardly wait until Lloyd gets here, because I would love to be able to sleep in two or three hour blocks again. How sad is that! ;)
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Play Time
One of the things we've been trying to capture on video for a while is Lloyd during one of his play times. However, he seems to know when we get the camera ready because he will promptly stop moving around. Anyway, while watching TV one night we were able to get the following video. However, the audio became corrupted at some point (which is probably for the best given that you pretty much just heard the TV in the background), so Brad added music and a couple other movie bits. Its a little over three minutes and you can get a good idea of his kicks as well as a knee or two. Also, what you are looking at it my right side (the red is my shirt and the blue is my jeans), which he likes to kick more than my left for some reason. He tends to explore his environment when our fingers or my arm or something pushes on my tummy. In fact just this morning, he was pushing back at Jenny while she was draped over my belly hoping to get some of my cerial...needless to say her preoccupation with my bowl meant she didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary.
I also recently started a photo album site through Shutterfly to house our family photos called Sundays in the Park - Photos (password: sundays). This will be a great way to share baby photos once there is a baby since it lets us notify members once new photos are added plus it gives people the opportunity to order prints if they are so inclined. I'm not going to add members until Lloyd is born, but in the meantime some of our vacation photos are up and you can check those out. Its a semi-private site just in that you need to type in the password before you can view the page...but we aren't exactly keeping that a super secret. ;) I also added a link in the sidebar to the right.
Lloyd playing at 35 weeks
I also recently started a photo album site through Shutterfly to house our family photos called Sundays in the Park - Photos (password: sundays). This will be a great way to share baby photos once there is a baby since it lets us notify members once new photos are added plus it gives people the opportunity to order prints if they are so inclined. I'm not going to add members until Lloyd is born, but in the meantime some of our vacation photos are up and you can check those out. Its a semi-private site just in that you need to type in the password before you can view the page...but we aren't exactly keeping that a super secret. ;) I also added a link in the sidebar to the right.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Random thoughts about bedrest
1. Its kinda nice to take a shower sitting in a chair
2. Yoga pants are the best invention EVER
3. Its amazing how switching from one side of the couch to the other can mark an important transition in the day
4. Sometimes its really hard to ask for things
5. You can eventually run out of things to look up online
6. You are an adult, but you can go a whole week without putting on a pair of shoes
7. Short, layered hair makes for awesome bedhead
8. You burp...a lot
9. When you don't shower every day...they feel so amazing!
10. You dream of being able to sit in a chair like a normal person
2. Yoga pants are the best invention EVER
3. Its amazing how switching from one side of the couch to the other can mark an important transition in the day
4. Sometimes its really hard to ask for things
5. You can eventually run out of things to look up online
6. You are an adult, but you can go a whole week without putting on a pair of shoes
7. Short, layered hair makes for awesome bedhead
8. You burp...a lot
9. When you don't shower every day...they feel so amazing!
10. You dream of being able to sit in a chair like a normal person
Friday, January 9, 2009
Drug-free at 35 weeks
Two more milestone completed: no more drugs and we've reached 35 weeks! Yesterday was my first day off my round-the-clock dosages of nifedapine. I'd like to say it was completely smooth sailing, but that would be fibbing.
What I have discovered is that between pregnancy hormones and the emotional vulnerabilities of bedrest, I have become extremely sensitive to outside comments. I am religiously practicing my pre-term labor hypnotherapy track, I am making plans for things based on a February birth, and I am trying to stay positive. Unfortunately, the new mistrust I have in my body (because of all of this) leaves me open to accepting thoughts that fall in the "realistic" vs. "positive" camp. This then opens the door for misjudging every little ache and pain...and practice contraction. And pretty soon its snowballs into "maybe I really did NEEDED those drugs", "maybe labor really is eminant", "what if this is labor NOW?"
So yeah, yesterday saw some snowballing...especially when I couldn't decide if I needed food or I was in labor at 3:00 am last night. The next thing I knew I was in full blown panic mode. Thankfully, Brad was able to "talk me down". He fed me, talked to me and got me right sided again. This morning, while tired, I felt a lot better. I also decided that there are a few things that are 100% fact at this point:
1. I never needed those drugs.
2. I will be pregnant all of January.
3. This baby will be born in February...February 10th if my brain ends up being right (my brain jumped right to this date during a hypnotherapy session I had the day I left the hospital).
4. Drinking water, eating regularly, using the bathroom regularly and staying relaxed are all I have to do to make this happen.
So there. Call me dilusional, call me unrealistic, call me whatever, but these are the things I need to believe right now if I'm going to do this successfuly.
To celebrate the next chapter of the rest of my pregnancy, Brad took a current photo of me today:
35 weeks
I'm still slightly shocked that we were not only able to take a photo, but I actually got it off my camera on the same day! I guess all this organization and 'keeping things handy' stuff really is working!
What I have discovered is that between pregnancy hormones and the emotional vulnerabilities of bedrest, I have become extremely sensitive to outside comments. I am religiously practicing my pre-term labor hypnotherapy track, I am making plans for things based on a February birth, and I am trying to stay positive. Unfortunately, the new mistrust I have in my body (because of all of this) leaves me open to accepting thoughts that fall in the "realistic" vs. "positive" camp. This then opens the door for misjudging every little ache and pain...and practice contraction. And pretty soon its snowballs into "maybe I really did NEEDED those drugs", "maybe labor really is eminant", "what if this is labor NOW?"
So yeah, yesterday saw some snowballing...especially when I couldn't decide if I needed food or I was in labor at 3:00 am last night. The next thing I knew I was in full blown panic mode. Thankfully, Brad was able to "talk me down". He fed me, talked to me and got me right sided again. This morning, while tired, I felt a lot better. I also decided that there are a few things that are 100% fact at this point:
1. I never needed those drugs.
2. I will be pregnant all of January.
3. This baby will be born in February...February 10th if my brain ends up being right (my brain jumped right to this date during a hypnotherapy session I had the day I left the hospital).
4. Drinking water, eating regularly, using the bathroom regularly and staying relaxed are all I have to do to make this happen.
So there. Call me dilusional, call me unrealistic, call me whatever, but these are the things I need to believe right now if I'm going to do this successfuly.
To celebrate the next chapter of the rest of my pregnancy, Brad took a current photo of me today:
35 weeksI'm still slightly shocked that we were not only able to take a photo, but I actually got it off my camera on the same day! I guess all this organization and 'keeping things handy' stuff really is working!
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Hospital Revisited
First of all...I'm still at home...I just wanted to post a couple photos off Brad's phone before it got too far away from my hospital stay last month.
Belly shot at 29 weeks...
And here's a quick video.
You can see all the pillows they like you to use while on bed rest to keep your legs, tummy and back supported while you are on your side. Also, I don't think this was a bad day, I think I just look sadder than I was, since I'm pretty sure we took the photo above the same day...but when you shower every 3 days...clothes don't really mean anything anymore ;-)
Belly shot at 29 weeks...
And here's a quick video.You can see all the pillows they like you to use while on bed rest to keep your legs, tummy and back supported while you are on your side. Also, I don't think this was a bad day, I think I just look sadder than I was, since I'm pretty sure we took the photo above the same day...but when you shower every 3 days...clothes don't really mean anything anymore ;-)
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Brief Photo Update
I've been meaning to post these photos for some time, but one thing that I've learned since being on bed rest is that everything takes longer to do. Not that I haven't had the most awesomest of care-takers ever, but its just that the little things get pushed to the side. I find this especially true when I need to ask other people for stuff. Is it absolutely necessary that I get my camera battery out of the charger this instant? No. Is it absolutely necessary that I get my wallet from my purse so that I can complete an online purchase right this second? No. So some things just go a little longer.
However, the camera battery is officially back in my camera and the camera cable has been plugged into the laptop long enough for me to get these off...we won't discuss how long it may take for me to get the photos I took at the hospital off my cell phone ;)
First up, I wanted to share what my constant bed rest companion looks like. This:
Or this:
The big red thing on the right is my belly - hee, hee
Needless to say Jenny is completely in love with my body pillow. I also feel that she could totally be a certified therapy dog. Not as they usually come, but specifically for bed rest recovery. She's nursed my grandma through a bought of stress fractures and she had previously nursed me through a couple wicked colds. But she has officially earned her place in doggy fame since I've been home from the hospital. She is next to me all day every day. There may be brief respites to eat, drink, potty and scratch her back under the Christmas tree, but otherwise, she is right there next to me...as she is as I write this. I really can't thank her enough...except when she steals my body pillow before I get to it!
I also sneaked a little belly progress photo the other day, just about at the 32 week mark. I figured this wasn't cheating since I was on my way to one of my sanctioned bathroom breaks and I took the photo in the bathroom mirror.
I feel way bigger than I probably look to most moms who've been through it all already, but since I haven't felt what its like to be 'really big' yet...this feels big. I also know he has about double his body weight to gain in the next 7 weeks, so I know I've got tons more growing to do.
That leads me to another point. As he's gotten bigger, his movements have obviously gotten stronger. They are still more cute than uncomfortable, but he's given me a couple good ones now that have actually hurt. (He of course loves to kick under my right lower rib that has been sore for most of the pregnancy.) We can also see a lot more movement through my tummy. I'm anxious to get some of it on video. So hopefully I will have a video to share in the near future.
However, the camera battery is officially back in my camera and the camera cable has been plugged into the laptop long enough for me to get these off...we won't discuss how long it may take for me to get the photos I took at the hospital off my cell phone ;)
First up, I wanted to share what my constant bed rest companion looks like. This:
Or this:
The big red thing on the right is my belly - hee, heeNeedless to say Jenny is completely in love with my body pillow. I also feel that she could totally be a certified therapy dog. Not as they usually come, but specifically for bed rest recovery. She's nursed my grandma through a bought of stress fractures and she had previously nursed me through a couple wicked colds. But she has officially earned her place in doggy fame since I've been home from the hospital. She is next to me all day every day. There may be brief respites to eat, drink, potty and scratch her back under the Christmas tree, but otherwise, she is right there next to me...as she is as I write this. I really can't thank her enough...except when she steals my body pillow before I get to it!
I also sneaked a little belly progress photo the other day, just about at the 32 week mark. I figured this wasn't cheating since I was on my way to one of my sanctioned bathroom breaks and I took the photo in the bathroom mirror.
I feel way bigger than I probably look to most moms who've been through it all already, but since I haven't felt what its like to be 'really big' yet...this feels big. I also know he has about double his body weight to gain in the next 7 weeks, so I know I've got tons more growing to do.
That leads me to another point. As he's gotten bigger, his movements have obviously gotten stronger. They are still more cute than uncomfortable, but he's given me a couple good ones now that have actually hurt. (He of course loves to kick under my right lower rib that has been sore for most of the pregnancy.) We can also see a lot more movement through my tummy. I'm anxious to get some of it on video. So hopefully I will have a video to share in the near future.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Week 32!
Well we made it! Week 32 is the first of several very important milestones in our quest for a full-term Lloyd! Week 32 was where the perinatologist at Mary Birch wanted me before I was sent home from the hospital. (Fortunately, my doctor was not as conservative in that department!) Week 32 also marks a major point in health for a pre-term baby...healthy lungs and he's going on 4 pounds now!
Our follow up visit this Thursday was also a very good one. The OB said that while I was down to 70% effaced last week, I was basically not-effaced this week at all! I also have been gaining my requisite weight on schedule (up exactly one pound from last week and about 18 pounds over all). My tummy also measured 30 cm, up from 29 cm the week before. I had read that at this point, your tummy, a rough measurement of the baby's growth, should measure about the same number of cm as your pregnancy week. This puts me a little under 2 cm behind schedule. However, our OB also said that with low carrying babies, this measurement isn't as consistent and that as long as I'm gaining weight and my tummy is growing, she is happy. The last thing she did, more for my reassurance than anything else, was a very quick ultrasound to check the level of my amniotic fluid (more about this later) - which was really good. All this made her comfortable enough to let me skip next week's follow up appointment - yay!
This news came at a perfect time. The previous week had been very challenging for me. I had several bouts of paranoia about various issues, the biggest one was that I was leaking amniotic fluid. The books (which I have been reading lots of recently...which may or may not have been a good thing) provide enough information to confuse the heck out of you and just when you think you have something resolved, they usually end up saying...'but, it could also be Scary Thing X, so be sure to talk to your doctor ASAP.' All this and given that this entire scare came as such a surprise to everyone, left me second guessing every ligament pull, belly soreness, back ache, and stiffness. The thing is that regardless, I am still growing a baby in my tummy (during one of his biggest growth spurt periods) and this doesn't exactly happen without ligament pulls, belly soreness, back aches, and stiffness.
I also knew that we were coming up on the 32 week mark. And my paranoia started making me scared for the worst case scenario. I hated the idea that after going through all of this, I could still possibly give birth now and Lloyd would have to live in the NICU for weeks. Don't get me wrong, I am very thankful that the NICU is there and I know that if he needed to be there, it would be the best place for him and he would be cared for by the best people possible. But we obviously would want him home with us.
These things left me more vulnerable to some other common issues also encountered with extended bedrest. I'm a planner. And I found all my plans turned upside down. I had to cancel the other baby classes we had signed up for (Baby Care Basics and nursing), since they are unable to make accommodations for people on bedrest. I've also felt pretty lost when it comes to reading the pregnancy books and even the updates I get from Baby Center. While they are obviously still helpful for the purposes of marking Lloyd's progress, a lot of the things no longer apply to me. I've also felt a little lost related to our planning for the birth itself, since there are now a lot of things I can't do. All the exercises are out. (I'm not even allowed to do Kegel's!) A lot of the HypnoBirthing birth preparation practices are out. And this is frustrating since practice is really the key to the whole method. I can practice relaxing, but is that enough?
Anyway, it was all of this all rolled together that was hard last week. I do feel much better now though and I feel that while things are certainly not as we planned, everything will be fine. And as Brad says, regardless of what happens at this point, we are still going to have our baby in the end of it all. And that really is the most important thing of all...everything is just details.
Our follow up visit this Thursday was also a very good one. The OB said that while I was down to 70% effaced last week, I was basically not-effaced this week at all! I also have been gaining my requisite weight on schedule (up exactly one pound from last week and about 18 pounds over all). My tummy also measured 30 cm, up from 29 cm the week before. I had read that at this point, your tummy, a rough measurement of the baby's growth, should measure about the same number of cm as your pregnancy week. This puts me a little under 2 cm behind schedule. However, our OB also said that with low carrying babies, this measurement isn't as consistent and that as long as I'm gaining weight and my tummy is growing, she is happy. The last thing she did, more for my reassurance than anything else, was a very quick ultrasound to check the level of my amniotic fluid (more about this later) - which was really good. All this made her comfortable enough to let me skip next week's follow up appointment - yay!
This news came at a perfect time. The previous week had been very challenging for me. I had several bouts of paranoia about various issues, the biggest one was that I was leaking amniotic fluid. The books (which I have been reading lots of recently...which may or may not have been a good thing) provide enough information to confuse the heck out of you and just when you think you have something resolved, they usually end up saying...'but, it could also be Scary Thing X, so be sure to talk to your doctor ASAP.' All this and given that this entire scare came as such a surprise to everyone, left me second guessing every ligament pull, belly soreness, back ache, and stiffness. The thing is that regardless, I am still growing a baby in my tummy (during one of his biggest growth spurt periods) and this doesn't exactly happen without ligament pulls, belly soreness, back aches, and stiffness.
I also knew that we were coming up on the 32 week mark. And my paranoia started making me scared for the worst case scenario. I hated the idea that after going through all of this, I could still possibly give birth now and Lloyd would have to live in the NICU for weeks. Don't get me wrong, I am very thankful that the NICU is there and I know that if he needed to be there, it would be the best place for him and he would be cared for by the best people possible. But we obviously would want him home with us.
These things left me more vulnerable to some other common issues also encountered with extended bedrest. I'm a planner. And I found all my plans turned upside down. I had to cancel the other baby classes we had signed up for (Baby Care Basics and nursing), since they are unable to make accommodations for people on bedrest. I've also felt pretty lost when it comes to reading the pregnancy books and even the updates I get from Baby Center. While they are obviously still helpful for the purposes of marking Lloyd's progress, a lot of the things no longer apply to me. I've also felt a little lost related to our planning for the birth itself, since there are now a lot of things I can't do. All the exercises are out. (I'm not even allowed to do Kegel's!) A lot of the HypnoBirthing birth preparation practices are out. And this is frustrating since practice is really the key to the whole method. I can practice relaxing, but is that enough?
Anyway, it was all of this all rolled together that was hard last week. I do feel much better now though and I feel that while things are certainly not as we planned, everything will be fine. And as Brad says, regardless of what happens at this point, we are still going to have our baby in the end of it all. And that really is the most important thing of all...everything is just details.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Things are good!
We went to the doctors yesterday and it looks like being off my feet is doing what it is supposed to do! My OB said that I was less effaced than before, which means that my cervix isn't as thin as it was. This doesn't mean I can go back to normal activity. She said he is still really low and putting a lot of pressure on my cervix. But at least it means that what I'm doing is having a positive affect.
The plan now is to have me officially on full bedrest and on my nifedapine until 35 weeks. She said then, she'll take me off the meds and that I can go about my normal activities. However, this means that I could go into labor at any point. So Brad's and my plan is for me to stay on bedrest for a few more weeks after that. We want this little boy full term if we can do anything about it! And really what's a few more weeks at that point anyway! But I won't deny I have fantasies about being able to go get the mail or go to the grocery store again! ;)
The other good news is that I'm having very few contractions now and I haven't had to use the terbutaline at all since I've been home. Each day is better than the previous day and as long as I stay hydrated and go to the bathroom often, I don't have any contractions at all! Plus, like at the hospital, I'm getting a little routine down and it almost doesn't seem like I don't leave the house. Although, going out for the appointment yesterday was really nice! We may have even stopped for frozen yogurt on the way home to make the most of it. Don't worry I stayed reclined in the car while Brad got them!
The plan now is to have me officially on full bedrest and on my nifedapine until 35 weeks. She said then, she'll take me off the meds and that I can go about my normal activities. However, this means that I could go into labor at any point. So Brad's and my plan is for me to stay on bedrest for a few more weeks after that. We want this little boy full term if we can do anything about it! And really what's a few more weeks at that point anyway! But I won't deny I have fantasies about being able to go get the mail or go to the grocery store again! ;)
The other good news is that I'm having very few contractions now and I haven't had to use the terbutaline at all since I've been home. Each day is better than the previous day and as long as I stay hydrated and go to the bathroom often, I don't have any contractions at all! Plus, like at the hospital, I'm getting a little routine down and it almost doesn't seem like I don't leave the house. Although, going out for the appointment yesterday was really nice! We may have even stopped for frozen yogurt on the way home to make the most of it. Don't worry I stayed reclined in the car while Brad got them!
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Home Sweet Home!
Fortunately things went really well on Thursday and Friday morning...and after asking the on call doctor what was next, he decided to send me home. I have a very sneaking suspicion I'd still be there if I hadn't asked how my doctor was supposed to find out my progress. He checked the doctors orders and then did a quick check on my cervix. And since it was the same, if not better than when my doctor had checked last, he said I was free to go!
I'm on the same restrictions here as I was there...laying down except to go to the bathroom (and the occasional shower), but I'm home! Brad's already looking into various options to be able to handle the positions better. What makes things tricky is that I can't be on my back because the weight of the baby rests on a major artery and can actually reduce blood flow to my heart...and Lloyd. I have to be tilted all the time. This is what kills my shoulders and my hips depending on where I'm laying. So Brad's doing some investigating. I'm certainly fine for a few days while we sort pillow or lawn chair recliner options. Its just hard because I hate to spend money right now on stuff that can't be used later as well...which is why we are taking some time right now to see what might work the best for the investment. Because I do know that two months will be a long time if I can't get comfortable! The hospital let us take the air mattress from my hospital bed home and that helps a ton when I'm on the futon...the pad for which we have had since 1996.
My mom, aunt and grandma came over yesterday as well and helped me get all the crafting paraphernalia put away. We also organized my knitting bin and put away all the random balls of yarn and unfinished knitting projects I had laying all over the place. Except for the coffee table and a good clean, the living room and dining room look great and make me feel much more at peace when I'm out there. Cora and Ichun also stopped by yesterday (leaving me with a knitter's paradise of projects to keep me busy - thanks again guys!) and picked up the few sewing projects I had hoped to finish before Lloyd's arrival. I was 1/2 way through another 6 bibs and I had had hopes to sew up a couple receiving blankets as well as my sling. Cora, Ichun and Marisa have offered to finish up those projects for me, which was wonderful! I was especially anxious about the sling...because clearly a shower pre-baby at this point (Shannon, Susan and Meagan where looking at having one for me the middle of January) may be a bit of a challenge and while I'm totally fine not having a stroller or any of that other stuff before he gets here, my sling was a key carrying accessory while he was still too small for the other baby carrying options. And yes, I know I could have ordered one, but I had already picked out some great fabric from my stash that matches the diaper bag I bought on deep discount in October. So yeah, very relieved on the crafting front as well!
Anyway, before I get too far away from my days in the hospital, I wanted to describe a bit of my daily routine for the curious as well as my own recollection down the road.
7:15 am - wake up, breakfast delivered, eat
8:00 am - day nurse comes in to take my diagnostics (temp, heart, lungs, blood pressure, leg swelling, standard questions - any leaking or bleeding? baby moving ok? any pain?) and give me my morning dose of niphetapine and pre-natal vitamin. I had them open my window as well.
(read until the doctor comes in)
9:30 am - on-call doctor comes in and says I might either be able to go home soon or I will be there awhile.
(read until monitoring time)
10:00 am - on the baby and contraction monitors for at least one hour...maybe longer if I either had more than 6 contractions or Lloyd falls asleep. I usually read or looked at magazines during this time.
11:30 am - lunch is delivered...as long as I was off the monitors by then, I could eat, otherwise had to wait until I was done.
(Brad usually arrived between 11:30 and 12:30. We usually watched a little TV while we ate lunch.)
2:00 pm - afternoon dose of niphetapine.
(internet, knitting, reading, talking, visiting until dinner)
5:00 pm - dinner delivered
(read until 7:00 - the time I decided I could have the TV on for the evening...any earlier and I found I got depressed and yucky feeling...TV really sucks by the way...I had 100 channels and there was still almost never anything on I wanted to watch...I did discover however, you can watch Law and Order all day long with cable - so crazy!)
(Brad usually left anywhere between 5:00 and 8:00 depending on his schedule.)
8:00 pm - Night nurse comes in and does my diagnostics, same deal, and gives me my evening dose of niphetapine.
9:00 pm - on the baby and contraction monitors again, same deal...only these didn't seem to usually go as well as in the morning and I was almost always on them for a couple hours.
(go to sleep between 10:30 and 11:00...or try to...one night my loud, bored roommate's water broke, so that was really scary for me).
2:00 am - Night dose of niphetapine.
(get up and go to the bathroom every two hours until breakfast the next morning)
So there you have it! That's how I kept my day full while in the hospital. All those little milestones during the day really kept it from being too much...there was always something to do in a half hour or so.
My overall impression of the nurses and doctors at Mary Birch is a very positive one. Despite different philosophies, all the doctors were very concerned about me and Lloyd and what was best for us. The nurses were awesome...except one night nurse that I had only once and happened to also be taking care of my roommate the night she went into labor-labor. Her biggest thing was that she was acting like it was the middle of the day even though it was 3 in the morning - slamming into our room, flipping on the hall light, talking at full volume, etc. None of the others did that. They were very conscientious of our sleep and being as quiet as possible for us. They also tried to assign us the same nurses as much as possible, which I also appreciated. There were a few I had several different days that I really liked and always was happy to see them come into my room.
And finally, I just wanted to say thank you for everyone who called and came to visit (both there and here). It's meant a ton to me for you guys to take time out of your days and busy schedules to bring me treats and things to do, but most importantly your company whether in person, over the phone or the internet. Its made a world of difference and I know I'll be continuing to need your company over the coming weeks, so I will thank you in advance as well!
Okay, well, I think the laptop is about ready to self-combust, so I'm going to say goodbye for now. Hope everyone has a wonderful Sunday!
I'm on the same restrictions here as I was there...laying down except to go to the bathroom (and the occasional shower), but I'm home! Brad's already looking into various options to be able to handle the positions better. What makes things tricky is that I can't be on my back because the weight of the baby rests on a major artery and can actually reduce blood flow to my heart...and Lloyd. I have to be tilted all the time. This is what kills my shoulders and my hips depending on where I'm laying. So Brad's doing some investigating. I'm certainly fine for a few days while we sort pillow or lawn chair recliner options. Its just hard because I hate to spend money right now on stuff that can't be used later as well...which is why we are taking some time right now to see what might work the best for the investment. Because I do know that two months will be a long time if I can't get comfortable! The hospital let us take the air mattress from my hospital bed home and that helps a ton when I'm on the futon...the pad for which we have had since 1996.
My mom, aunt and grandma came over yesterday as well and helped me get all the crafting paraphernalia put away. We also organized my knitting bin and put away all the random balls of yarn and unfinished knitting projects I had laying all over the place. Except for the coffee table and a good clean, the living room and dining room look great and make me feel much more at peace when I'm out there. Cora and Ichun also stopped by yesterday (leaving me with a knitter's paradise of projects to keep me busy - thanks again guys!) and picked up the few sewing projects I had hoped to finish before Lloyd's arrival. I was 1/2 way through another 6 bibs and I had had hopes to sew up a couple receiving blankets as well as my sling. Cora, Ichun and Marisa have offered to finish up those projects for me, which was wonderful! I was especially anxious about the sling...because clearly a shower pre-baby at this point (Shannon, Susan and Meagan where looking at having one for me the middle of January) may be a bit of a challenge and while I'm totally fine not having a stroller or any of that other stuff before he gets here, my sling was a key carrying accessory while he was still too small for the other baby carrying options. And yes, I know I could have ordered one, but I had already picked out some great fabric from my stash that matches the diaper bag I bought on deep discount in October. So yeah, very relieved on the crafting front as well!
Anyway, before I get too far away from my days in the hospital, I wanted to describe a bit of my daily routine for the curious as well as my own recollection down the road.
7:15 am - wake up, breakfast delivered, eat
8:00 am - day nurse comes in to take my diagnostics (temp, heart, lungs, blood pressure, leg swelling, standard questions - any leaking or bleeding? baby moving ok? any pain?) and give me my morning dose of niphetapine and pre-natal vitamin. I had them open my window as well.
(read until the doctor comes in)
9:30 am - on-call doctor comes in and says I might either be able to go home soon or I will be there awhile.
(read until monitoring time)
10:00 am - on the baby and contraction monitors for at least one hour...maybe longer if I either had more than 6 contractions or Lloyd falls asleep. I usually read or looked at magazines during this time.
11:30 am - lunch is delivered...as long as I was off the monitors by then, I could eat, otherwise had to wait until I was done.
(Brad usually arrived between 11:30 and 12:30. We usually watched a little TV while we ate lunch.)
2:00 pm - afternoon dose of niphetapine.
(internet, knitting, reading, talking, visiting until dinner)
5:00 pm - dinner delivered
(read until 7:00 - the time I decided I could have the TV on for the evening...any earlier and I found I got depressed and yucky feeling...TV really sucks by the way...I had 100 channels and there was still almost never anything on I wanted to watch...I did discover however, you can watch Law and Order all day long with cable - so crazy!)
(Brad usually left anywhere between 5:00 and 8:00 depending on his schedule.)
8:00 pm - Night nurse comes in and does my diagnostics, same deal, and gives me my evening dose of niphetapine.
9:00 pm - on the baby and contraction monitors again, same deal...only these didn't seem to usually go as well as in the morning and I was almost always on them for a couple hours.
(go to sleep between 10:30 and 11:00...or try to...one night my loud, bored roommate's water broke, so that was really scary for me).
2:00 am - Night dose of niphetapine.
(get up and go to the bathroom every two hours until breakfast the next morning)
So there you have it! That's how I kept my day full while in the hospital. All those little milestones during the day really kept it from being too much...there was always something to do in a half hour or so.
My overall impression of the nurses and doctors at Mary Birch is a very positive one. Despite different philosophies, all the doctors were very concerned about me and Lloyd and what was best for us. The nurses were awesome...except one night nurse that I had only once and happened to also be taking care of my roommate the night she went into labor-labor. Her biggest thing was that she was acting like it was the middle of the day even though it was 3 in the morning - slamming into our room, flipping on the hall light, talking at full volume, etc. None of the others did that. They were very conscientious of our sleep and being as quiet as possible for us. They also tried to assign us the same nurses as much as possible, which I also appreciated. There were a few I had several different days that I really liked and always was happy to see them come into my room.
And finally, I just wanted to say thank you for everyone who called and came to visit (both there and here). It's meant a ton to me for you guys to take time out of your days and busy schedules to bring me treats and things to do, but most importantly your company whether in person, over the phone or the internet. Its made a world of difference and I know I'll be continuing to need your company over the coming weeks, so I will thank you in advance as well!
Okay, well, I think the laptop is about ready to self-combust, so I'm going to say goodbye for now. Hope everyone has a wonderful Sunday!
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Bathroom Privileges
So, sorry to leave anyone hanging...but its taken until today for me to have internet access from my hospital room. Yup, that's right...hospital room. It's funny because I still can't believe this is something we are going through. I never in a million years expected to have anything but the most run of the mill, normal pregnancy. And in about 5 minutes on Wednesday, my normal healthy pregnancy turned into a high-risk pregnancy...with the possibility I could deliver at any time.
We made it to triage at Mary Birch on Wednesday about 4:30pm and by the time they had me on the monitors, they found I was having several contractions each hour in addition to the advanced state of my cervix (I'm supposed to measure 3 cm and I'm measuring 6 mm). The doctors prepared my body for labor (antibiotics for strep B) and Lloyd for birth (steroids to help his lungs mature) in case they couldn't get things under control. This meant that I spent the first couple of days being intermittently hooked up to an IV and had round the clock fetal and contraction monitors.
Fortunately, the perinatologist is very happy with Lloyd's condition. He is estimated at 2 and 1/2 lbs, head down, and his heart rate and activity levels are excellent. The specialist said that if I were to go to into labor now, he had a really good survival rate...although this would require a lengthy stay in the NICU. He now only needs to be on the monitor for a hour each morning...during which time he spends most of the time kicking the monitors and the bands that hold them on.
I've also been doing well, I'm off the IV and my contractions are monitored twice a day. Unfortunately, while they haven't been bad enough to necessitate the more extreme magnesium treatment to stop them, they aren't always within the threshold the doctors like to see. Basically if you have less than 6 per hour, you can be usually be maintained with an oral drug niphetapene. But if I hit 6 or more (and I seem to hit exactly 6 when I do have too many), they give you a shot of tributalene. This is not something I like. Not only does the drug make my heart race, but it means that they are less likely to feel I will be stable at home.
So, that brings me to where I am today. The perinatologist wants me to be here until I reach 32 weeks (I'm 29 1/2 now). Each OB that rounds each morning has had a difference philosophy about how to manage patients in my situation. Some say it doesn't matter if I'm here or home, others are more cautious and would only want me in a hospital. And since they are all so different, they are all differing to my doctor...who hasn't come back from Thanksgiving vacation yet. Right now, it sounds like she may be here on Thursday, but I'm not holding my breath.
What makes this okay with me is that I know I am getting good care and I feel that we've made the best medical decisions we could for both me and Lloyd to ensure his survival. I also know that the irregularity of my contractions scares me and I'm sure my doctor would want me here until they stabilize regardless. I just hope to stabilize soon so that I can avoid the tributalene shot as much as possible, since I can't imagine my heart is the only thing being affected by the drug. (And no, I'm not going to Google search it and please don't tell me what you find if you do.)
There are also pros and cons for being both here and at home. I miss being home terribly, but I also know why I'm here and that provides a lot of comfort. Being here is also easier for Brad because he would be completely overloaded caring for me as well as the entire house and his own obligations...because if I'm home, I can't do anything. I can't get my food, I can't let the dog out...in fact, all I can do is go to the bathroom when I need to. Even my showers are carefully monitored so I'm not vertical for too long. Plus, I'm not tempted to do anything while I'm here. I can't see the fabric for the bibs that are almost done or the sling I never made. I can't see the pile of knitting stuff I had planned to organized last weekend. So again, for so many reasons, being here is a very good thing.
I also got a chance to meet a few of the other women staying in the unit with me today as part of a support group. I wasn't planning to go, but in the end it was a really great excuse to get out of my room and hear that other women are going through the same thing...and some have already been here for 3 weeks or more, so clearly it is possible. They also gave us newbees the hook up...I also found out there is a special menu you have access to after you've been here a week and you may also be granted wheelchair privileges, so trips outside might be possible at some point in the future as well.
So, that's where things are at the moment. We are fine and we are just thankful for that follow up ultrasound last week. (I can only imagine what all the cleaning and organizing I had planned for the long weekend would have done!) My goal is to have a full term baby, so I'm going to do whatever I need to do to make that happen.
We made it to triage at Mary Birch on Wednesday about 4:30pm and by the time they had me on the monitors, they found I was having several contractions each hour in addition to the advanced state of my cervix (I'm supposed to measure 3 cm and I'm measuring 6 mm). The doctors prepared my body for labor (antibiotics for strep B) and Lloyd for birth (steroids to help his lungs mature) in case they couldn't get things under control. This meant that I spent the first couple of days being intermittently hooked up to an IV and had round the clock fetal and contraction monitors.
Fortunately, the perinatologist is very happy with Lloyd's condition. He is estimated at 2 and 1/2 lbs, head down, and his heart rate and activity levels are excellent. The specialist said that if I were to go to into labor now, he had a really good survival rate...although this would require a lengthy stay in the NICU. He now only needs to be on the monitor for a hour each morning...during which time he spends most of the time kicking the monitors and the bands that hold them on.
I've also been doing well, I'm off the IV and my contractions are monitored twice a day. Unfortunately, while they haven't been bad enough to necessitate the more extreme magnesium treatment to stop them, they aren't always within the threshold the doctors like to see. Basically if you have less than 6 per hour, you can be usually be maintained with an oral drug niphetapene. But if I hit 6 or more (and I seem to hit exactly 6 when I do have too many), they give you a shot of tributalene. This is not something I like. Not only does the drug make my heart race, but it means that they are less likely to feel I will be stable at home.
So, that brings me to where I am today. The perinatologist wants me to be here until I reach 32 weeks (I'm 29 1/2 now). Each OB that rounds each morning has had a difference philosophy about how to manage patients in my situation. Some say it doesn't matter if I'm here or home, others are more cautious and would only want me in a hospital. And since they are all so different, they are all differing to my doctor...who hasn't come back from Thanksgiving vacation yet. Right now, it sounds like she may be here on Thursday, but I'm not holding my breath.
What makes this okay with me is that I know I am getting good care and I feel that we've made the best medical decisions we could for both me and Lloyd to ensure his survival. I also know that the irregularity of my contractions scares me and I'm sure my doctor would want me here until they stabilize regardless. I just hope to stabilize soon so that I can avoid the tributalene shot as much as possible, since I can't imagine my heart is the only thing being affected by the drug. (And no, I'm not going to Google search it and please don't tell me what you find if you do.)
There are also pros and cons for being both here and at home. I miss being home terribly, but I also know why I'm here and that provides a lot of comfort. Being here is also easier for Brad because he would be completely overloaded caring for me as well as the entire house and his own obligations...because if I'm home, I can't do anything. I can't get my food, I can't let the dog out...in fact, all I can do is go to the bathroom when I need to. Even my showers are carefully monitored so I'm not vertical for too long. Plus, I'm not tempted to do anything while I'm here. I can't see the fabric for the bibs that are almost done or the sling I never made. I can't see the pile of knitting stuff I had planned to organized last weekend. So again, for so many reasons, being here is a very good thing.
I also got a chance to meet a few of the other women staying in the unit with me today as part of a support group. I wasn't planning to go, but in the end it was a really great excuse to get out of my room and hear that other women are going through the same thing...and some have already been here for 3 weeks or more, so clearly it is possible. They also gave us newbees the hook up...I also found out there is a special menu you have access to after you've been here a week and you may also be granted wheelchair privileges, so trips outside might be possible at some point in the future as well.
So, that's where things are at the moment. We are fine and we are just thankful for that follow up ultrasound last week. (I can only imagine what all the cleaning and organizing I had planned for the long weekend would have done!) My goal is to have a full term baby, so I'm going to do whatever I need to do to make that happen.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Quick update
We had our follow up ultrasound today. The good news is that one of Lloyd's kidneys is normal size and one is only ever so slightly enlarged, so they aren't really worried about it. The bad news is that apparently my cervix measured short (it gets shorter as you progress through labor, so yeah, not supposed to be short at 28/29 weeks) and it looks like its pulling some of the amniotic fluid down a bit (the term funneling was used). So, we are off to Mary Birch to get a full check out. We just stopped home to grab stuff to keep us busy and I'm eating a bit since we have no clue how long we will be there. Keep your fingers crossed that they are just going to tell me to take it easy...since I'm sure this is just a result of all the stress of the last week or so.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
So this week had to get better, right? Well, I guess it did. I still have a job (right now).I still have 80% of my income. I now have every Monday off. It appears I still qualify for my maternity benefits in January. I still work with 75% of my co-workers. Baby health insurance costs only $300 per month (by adding the 'only' I'm trying to make this a positive statement...which is really hard to do). We only had one small earthquake this morning.
And in the true nature of cosmic balance, for every blow I've received this week, Brad's received a boost. He received some amazing news this week and one of his lifelong dreams is now very much within reach. There are still hoops to jump but he is so close now!
And in the grand scheme of things: we have our health, we have a roof over our heads, we can still pay our bills, and we are expecting the amazing gift of our son in February. We will be fine.
And for another positive...it was 85 degrees last Sunday! Which means we could sit in the shade in our short sleeve t-shirts in the middle of November. Living in San Diego has its privileges.
Here's a progress shot at 27 weeks:
And here's a shot of my favorite 'maternity' t-shirt. Its super nerdy and totally not about being pregnant, but it sure does work...
So the positive thoughts will continue to flow and will be flowing out to all of you. This is a hard time for so many people, but we will all get through it and things will get better.
And in the true nature of cosmic balance, for every blow I've received this week, Brad's received a boost. He received some amazing news this week and one of his lifelong dreams is now very much within reach. There are still hoops to jump but he is so close now!
And in the grand scheme of things: we have our health, we have a roof over our heads, we can still pay our bills, and we are expecting the amazing gift of our son in February. We will be fine.
And for another positive...it was 85 degrees last Sunday! Which means we could sit in the shade in our short sleeve t-shirts in the middle of November. Living in San Diego has its privileges.
Here's a progress shot at 27 weeks:
And here's a shot of my favorite 'maternity' t-shirt. Its super nerdy and totally not about being pregnant, but it sure does work...
So the positive thoughts will continue to flow and will be flowing out to all of you. This is a hard time for so many people, but we will all get through it and things will get better.
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